没人疼，没人爱，小心单身是公害。
——蔡依林《单身公害》
当真要搞？果然要搞？虽然，你那么真诚地想要搞个恋爱，可还是每天在厕所唱一个人的精彩？是的你应该被呵护被珍惜被认真被深爱被捧在手掌心上，我也知道每次你看见姐妹的双宿双飞多冲动。所以我要告诉你，冥冥中真就藏了恐怖分子在破坏你跟另一半的缘分，为了名花有主的未来，把他们逮出来！
恐怖分子一号！路边有花没空采
好多人摆明了是想找对象，连半张床都腾出来了，可一到真章就……每次同事朋友喊你出去应酬，你压着一桌子公文，咧着嘴：“今儿算了，改天吧，等我把这单搞定的。”当时你心里肯定这么想：“等咱升职加薪了咱好好疯一把，那个福星小子让他先等等。”谁等谁呢？三天两头还好，你三年五年不升职，人家都福星老子啦。
反恐主张：把自己送进实话实说，问你自己，当下，现在，如今，2006年，是不该考虑感情生活啦？如果是，那就迈出勇敢一步，自个创造机会。哪怕上网登记交友呢，跟亲戚朋友说开了你要招亲，约几个单身伙伴每周末出来嗨皮一下。千万别让失败的约会把你吓回成工作狂，因为一次真正的风花雪月能让你感慨前面多少年都白活了……到时候谢我来得及。
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恐怖分子二号！太相信一见钟情
这世界节奏快啊，用不着一千年以后，拍脑袋的当儿就有人下结论了。来自旧金山的阿伦娜雷芙总是卡掉男士的献媚：“见面五秒钟，我就发现这人真没劲！”她抱怨道。问题在于咱们中间，有几个敢说是少女或者少男杀手的？好就算你是杀手，五秒钟让你俘虏一个人，谁有这本事？五秒钟啊……阿伦娜不好意思了：“我都一年没约会了呀，不能赖别人，是我没给人帅哥机会来秀出魅力，多一点点耐心就好了。”
反恐主张：避免当机立断地排斥谁。假如上面说的阿伦娜就是你本人，送你两条妙计：锦囊一，是跟自己订条约，跟人约会至少要坚持一杯咖啡(好好喝，好好品，两口干掉不算)，你这么想：我要是陪人喝杯拿铁都噎得慌，那我也太菜了。锦囊二，制造二次约会。觉得对谁有好感，或者最起码不讨厌，就再约一次，一般来讲，再见面你俩都放松多了，好交心，好制造故事哦。
恐怖分子三号！过尽千帆皆不是
缺少标准的人生绝对不够小资，我同意。但朋友们的意见得听进去，尤其单身朋友的。是否总没人理解你：为啥不追那个老谁家的小谁呢？嫌人家短？嫌人家高？嫌人家不爱吃面条？闹了半天是嫌人家领带难看，你可真够浪费自然资源的。回头看择偶配置单儿里某些不是“必须”的条件就划了吧。
反恐主张：重新资产评估一下，哪些才是重要的。一般关于未来伴侣的事，我们统统都猜错。他要多高，有没有胡子，戴不戴隐形……那都是理想啊，哥们，关于两个人要怎么条件才能亲密无间契合半生，你我的水平都是国小一年级。真正牵手偕老的人们，又有几对是满足理想条件的？相濡以沫的夫妻关系，通常建立在共同的价值观和兴趣之上，约会的时候，多留意这个，少盯人家裤腿儿长短。
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恐怖分子四号！曾经沧海难为水
他离去，那天忽然倾盆大雨，忘记关的窗……那快乐太清楚，才衬出现在的孤独，你在电话里跟我们挨个倾诉，念叨七八年，本也无伤大雅。可后来你发现，遇到好赖帅哥都跟他比，总是关心他的消息，甚至琢磨该不该把新恋曲跟他讲，那就属于当断不断。跟谁吃吃喝喝，躺在谁身边都没感觉，还搞什么啊，心让人领走还没回来呢。
反恐主张：首先批准自己开启新的一页，江山代有帅哥出嘛。当然一时半会儿你很难走出过去，那是因为还没建立起支持网络，或者叫亲友团，有那么几个号码是在你最无助的时候，毫无理由就想拨的，其中就有前男友。你被上司冤枉了，家里金鱼下仔了，好坏的种种你总想跟那家伙分享，抵制这种诱惑跟断奶差不多，不妨找个替代，换成跟老妈说说不行吗？适应了，放下了，才有心情冲着新人笑。
恐怖分子五号！一千个伤心的理由
朋友小聚的时候你有没有遇到话题往不良方向发展？我指那些怨天尤人的牢骚：老板老板没脑子、同事同事小心眼、家里班上一脑门官司、周末嗨皮还碰上穷酸……所有这些自怜自艾的主，自己那儿陶醉得不行，没留神吓跑多少人呢，以后哥几个见你都避之唯恐不及。
反恐主张：换个活法。蓝调忧伤小夜曲，买账的人太少，阳光女孩更美丽。用积极活泼包装你自己，帅哥们出来俩钟头也不是听谁诉苦的，好老公不一定都是好心理医生，承认吧？别把浪漫的机会变成忆苦思甜大会。你更可以收集身边丑小鸭变天鹅、青蛙变王子的上进故事，以备必要时扭转话题走向。那个印象给人肯定深刻。
恋爱漫道真如铁，而今迈步从头约，从头约，缘分在你，当我没写。
(译文，材自“Why are you still single?” by Jerusha Stewart, msn亲蜜有约频道)
- 大胖 06-3-13
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